With years of wisdom and a lifetime of experiences to draw upon, you have a unique story to tell. Your story has the power to give a new generation a roadmap to success, inspiration to pursue their dreams, or the ability to prioritize what truly matters in life. In this article, we’ll explore what makes a great memoir, how to choose impactful memoir topics, and how to plan and write your book. Let’s dive in and discover the story only you can tell.
What is a Memoir?
A memoir is more than just a collection of memories; it’s a slice of life with a purpose. Therefore, memoirs focus on specific experiences, emotions, and themes. It’s a way to share your personal story and experiences with others, offering insights and lessons that might resonate with readers going through similar situations. Memoir serves several purposes: preserving memories, gaining new insights, and fostering connections with others as a source of encouragement or inspiration.
Have you ever thought about what you want your memoir to say? What lessons or experiences do you feel are most important to share? Add to these questions—one thing new memoirists neglect to think about—who is your audience?
Memoir vs. Autobiography
You might be wondering, What’s the difference between a memoir and an autobiography? It’s a common question. While an autobiography covers your entire life chronologically, a memoir zeroes in on a specific aspect or period of your life. Think of it as looking through a camera lens—you’re zooming in on the parts that matter most. This focused approach allows you to explore deeper emotions and themes, making your story more relatable and impactful for your readers.
Memoir Examples
To get a better idea of what makes a memoir compelling, here are a few examples that I’ve enjoyed reading. I’ve included links to each as I highly recommend reading these books as well as other books by memoirists as it’s important to read them if you want to write them!
Maid by Stephanie Land recounts Land’s journey from struggling single mother to published author: it is a powerful story of resilience. In her book, Land explores themes of poverty, social inequality, and determination. What makes her memoir stand out is how she uses her personal experiences to shed light on larger societal issues, all while maintaining a relatable and honest tone. While reading it, I could feel the intensity of her struggle and wholeheartedly rooted for her as she faced challenges and fought to retain her self-respect and achieve small victories. The inspiration I take from the book is how Land was able to work full-time, struggle against a system that routinely let single parents down, raise her daughter, and all the while, aspire to take creative writing classes. This experience teaches us that our potential is greater than we sometimes realize, and we see that through her book.
Wild by Cheryl Strayed is a vivid and deeply personal story of her transformative journey as she hikes along the Pacific Crest Trail. Through her memoir, she bears her soul, delving into her grief, personal challenges, and the profound journey that led her to self-discovery. Strayed’s ability to turn her physical journey into a powerful symbol of healing is what captivates readers, resulting in an inspiring and profoundly personal narrative. The hiking trip acts as a connecting thread, drawing parallels between her challenges in the wilderness and the hardships she faced in her past. It also provides a valuable lesson in organizing a memoir, which I talk more about below.
In Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert documents her search for joy and spiritual enlightenment through a trip that takes her to Italy, India, and Indonesia. Gilbert’s honest examination of her vulnerabilities and triumphs is what makes this book so compelling, motivating readers to embark on their own quests for self-discovery, exactly the kind of result you’d see from a well-read well-loved memoir.
How These Memoirs Are Structured and Why?
Maid by Stephanie Land is structured around Land’s journey as a house cleaner, struggling to provide for her family while navigating a system that often feels stacked against her. This linear, chronological structure helps readers follow her journey from hardship to success, highlighting the systemic issues she faced and the personal growth she experienced. The straightforward structure allows the rawness of her experiences and emotions to shine through, making her story accessible and relatable.
Wild by Cheryl Strayed uses a dual narrative structure, intertwining her solo hike on the Pacific Crest Trail with flashbacks of her past. This structure serves to juxtapose her physical journey with her emotional healing process, illustrating how each step she takes on the trail is also a step towards overcoming her grief and personal struggles. The non-linear format reflects the disjointed nature of grief and recovery, making her journey feel authentic and resonant.
Elizabeth Gilbert’s memoir, Eat, Pray, Love, is structured into three sections that reflect her travels in Italy, India, and Indonesia. The various sections of her journey emphasize different aspects: enjoyment, devotion, and harmony. The three-part structure echoes Gilbert’s search for a more balanced life, where each location symbolizes a distinct phase in her journey of self-discovery. The memoir’s distinct structure allows readers to seamlessly accompany the author on her path, absorbing the meaningful lessons she discovers along the way.
These examples show that the structure of a memoir is not just about the order of events; it’s about how the structure supports the story’s message(s). Whether chronological, dual-narrative, or segmented, the structure should enhance the reader’s understanding and emotional connection to the story.
How to Write Your Memoir
Now that you have an idea of what a memoir can be, let’s talk about planning your own. Using Jennie Nash’s Blueprint for a Memoir, and Rachael Herron’s Fast Draft Your Memoir, two of my favorite memoir instructionals, we can break down the planning process into manageable steps.
How to Choose Topics?
To answer the question, what should I write my memoir about, you will need to focus. Start by thinking about 3 to 5 transformational moments in your life. These are the experiences that changed you, shaped your beliefs, or led you to where you are today. This is what I mean by choosing your memoir topic, giving you an opportunity to home in on what your memoir is going to be about.
What challenges did you face? What strategies did you use to successfully overcome those difficulties? Consider how these experiences can offer insights or lessons to your readers. Finally, your memoir isn’t solely about you. It’s about connecting with others through your story. So, ask yourself, what can my reader learn from my experience. What is the takeaway?
Who is My Audience?
Frequently overlooked in planning a memoir is understanding your audience. Are you writing for people who have experienced similar challenges? Or are you hoping to reach those who are looking for inspiration and guidance? Knowing your audience will help you tailor your story to their needs and interests, making your memoir more engaging and impactful. Who are you writing for?
What Impact Will My Memoir Have on Readers?
Ask yourself: What do I want my readers to take away from my memoir? Whether it’s a lesson in resilience, a new perspective on a familiar issue, or simply the comfort of knowing they’re not alone, your memoir should offer something valuable to your readers. This is where you can really connect with your audience and make a difference in their lives.
How to Structure Your Memoir?
Once you’ve identified your key moments and your audience, think about how you want to structure your memoir. Will it be chronological, taking readers through your story from point A to point B, like Stephanie Land’s book? Or will it be thematic, like Strayed’s book with a single thread connecting her growth and healing over time? Or will you develop clear beginning, middle, and end that point to lessons that profoundly changed your life, like Gilbert? In any case, both Nash and Herron suggest creating an outline to help you organize your thoughts and ensure that your narrative flows smoothly from beginning to end.
Begin Writing Your Memoir.
With your plan in place, it’s time to start writing! Here are some tips to help you along the way.
Start with a Compelling Opening
Your opening should grab the reader’s attention and set the tone for the rest of the book. Consider starting with a powerful anecdote or a pivotal moment that encapsulates the essence of your story. This will draw readers in and make them want to know more. My advice is to not worry about this step too much at the start of your writing journey, because chances are you’ll end up revising it as you progress through the manuscript. Why? The act of writing the book will lead to new and unexpected insights. So, relax, it will come.
Build a Strong Narrative
As you write, focus on developing a strong narrative. This means crafting well-rounded characters (including yourself), creating tension and conflict, and building to a satisfying resolution. When I talk about tension and conflict, I am not necessarily talking about an argument or a fight, but rather about what is on the line for the main character (which is you in the case of a memoir). Will Strayed’s hike lead to a personal revelation for her? Is Land going to retain custody of her daughter? Will Gilbert discover what she is searching for?
Don’t be afraid to delve into the emotional aspects of your story—it’s these raw, honest moments that will resonate most with your readers. Constructing a compelling narrative will not happen overnight. If you’re new to writing, you’ll probably begin by describing “what occurred” and it will take time for you to grasp “why it was important.” Again, don’t sweat it; it will come with personal exploration and discovery as you write.
Edit and Revise Your Manuscript
Once you’ve finished the first draft, now what? Hemingway said, “writing is rewriting.” What he meant by that, and what published authors know, is that revision is where the true story comes out—truly.
Once you’ve completed your first draft, set it aside for a while before revising. This will give you fresh eyes to see where improvements can be made. Consider seeking feedback from a trained book coach (like me) or beta readers. Now is not the time to hire an editor to polish your words. Not yet. A good rule of thumb is to seek big picture guidance first before zeroing in on the editing. This approach ensures that you don’t waste time perfecting something that doesn’t serve the story. It may ultimately be cut in an effort to streamline your memoir narrative to its essential elements.
Final Thoughts about Writing Memoir
Writing a memoir is a journey of self-discovery and transformation. It’s an opportunity to share your story, connect with others, and make a lasting impact. Whether you’re writing to inspire, educate, or simply share your experiences, your memoir has the potential to touch the lives of others. So, take that first step—reflect on your life, choose the moments that matter most, and start writing.
Your story is worth telling, and there are readers who are waiting to hear it.
In the comments below:
what are some of your favorite memoirs to read?
What is one takeaway your can share?
Happy writing!
Nancy Clements is a book coach for fiction, non-fiction, and memoir and founder of Second Act Book Coaching. She particularly likes to help analytical types tap into their creative side to write the book they’ve always wanted to write.